you WILL have a good time

After party notes to a friend:

There's a difference between being a good hostess and being so intent on everyone having the best possible time that you make the atmosphere in the room tense. You can promote fun just by relaxing a little and enjoying your own party.

For example:

1. If my drink is empty, I don't need you to leap to your feet and run to get me another.
2. If I don't eat an appetiser every minute, this doesn't mean I don't like them.
3. Ditto having seconds of dinner. The food was great. I just didn't want to roll home.
4. People wanting to go home before midnight doesn't mean the party sucked. 11:30pm is late for people whose seven and ten-year-old children are at the party with them.
5. Dancing: not everyone's into it. And that's okay.

We all had fun. I'm just not certain we had enough fun to satisfy her sense of what a 'great party' is. And I didn't like feeling like that was my role.