a little east of reality

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

wednesday wt..? garbage truck

Call of nature saves man from garbage crusher
(7 Dec 2005)

BERLIN - A German wino man who fell asleep in a rubbish container after a bout of heavy drinking had a lucky escape after he was tipped into the hydraulic press of a garbage truck, police said on Wednesday.

The 47-year-old who moments before had been dreaming of large-breasted Russian women was only saved from being squashed like a bug crushed when the truck‘s driver who had also had a little too much to drink stopped to urinate before continuing his round. Realising that the paperwork was going to be a bitch if he didn't, he quickly switched off the press after he heard swearing coming from the truck‘s interior. "I often hear voices," said the driver, "but inside my head, not inside the crusher."

"The man, who is usually quite claustrophobic admitted drinking a lot of booze the previous night and climbing into the container to avoid facing his wife drunk seek refuge from the rain where he passed out," the police said in a statement. "We're just glad to see that he wasn't foolish enough to drink and drive."

The man, from somewhere difficult to spell Fischbachtal in southwestern Germany, suffered only a minor head injury, weeks of embarrassment, and mild shock. He has since decided it is better to go home drunk than flat and bloody.