a little east of reality

Thursday, March 20, 2008

lines I like from buffy

Recently I insulted the scriptwriting in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and Industrial Athena threatened to use my kidneys for ping pong balls (or, you know, something like that) unless I retracted said vile statements and checked it out properly. Hence I am now watching all seven series. What I have discovered so far is that while (as IA herself conceded) the first season does suck as much as I remembered, there is some pretty witty banter in there. I also discovered that while Angel, by the time I saw him in his own series, was fair to middling in the hotness department...in the first six episodes of season one, he was 'I think my knees just melted' hot.
























Anyway, I'll be posting some Buffy quotes from time to time for your reading pleasure. Here are some snippets from the first six episodes:

Ep 101

Giles challenges Buffy to 'spot the vampire' in a nightclub and she does...by his terrible fashion sense.
Buffy: Deal with that outfit for a moment.
Giles: It's dated?
Buffy: It's carbon-dated.
Ep 102

1. They're trying to work out where the vamps went.
Buffy: As soon as I got clear of the graveyard they kind of just...voom.
Xander: They can fly?
Buffy: They can drive.
2. Buffy's at the nightclub the next night, doing the slaying thing. She holds a mike stand, ready to throw it.

Macho vampire: You forget, metal can't hurt me.
Buffy: There's something you forgot about, too...sunrise.

She throws the stand, breaks a glass panel and light streams in. The vamp reels from it, then stops, wondering why he isn't burning. We see the source of the light...a regular globe on the ceiling. Buffy stakes him.
Buffy: It's in about nine hours, moron.
He dies.

Ep 103

Nothing jumped out at me. A few things did jump out at Buffy, but sans snappy dialogue.

Ep 104

Giles is explaining the modus operandum of the scary she-mantis, who incidentally has Zander.
Giles: Basically the she-mantis assumes the form of a beautiful woman and then lures innocent virgins back to her nest.
Buffy: Virgins? Well Zander's...not a... I mean, he's probably...
Willow: Gonna die.
Ep 105

Giles and Buffy are in the library researching. Superfine boy (Owen) walks in and Buffy turns into starry-eyed girl. Giles is...less than happy about this.

Buffy: Ooh, Owen. Hi.
Giles: What do you want?
Owen: Uh...book?
Giles(Remembers he's the librarian at this school.): Oh.
Buffy (to Giles): See this is a school, and we have students, and they check out books, and then they learn things.
Giles: I was beginning to suspect that was a myth.

Ep 106

Zander has become hyena-like and mean (it's a curse thingy). Buffy consults 'the expert on weird', Giles.
Giles: Zander's taken to teasing the less fortunate?
Buffy: Uh huh.
Giles: And uh...there's a noticeable change in both clothing and demeanour?
Buffy: Yes.
Giles: And...well, otherwise all his spare time's spent lounging about with imbecils?
Buffy: It's bad, isn't it?
Giles: It's devastating. He's turned into a sixteen-year-old boy. Of course, you'll have to kill him.
Buffy: Giles, I'm serious!
Giles: So am I...except for the part about killing him.
It's late, so that's all for now. The next episode is called Angel. Seeing as he's been mysterious and hot (but not told anyone he's a vampire) so far, I'm guessing that's the episode where Buffy finds out. Should be good. ^_^

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