a little east of reality

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

and canberra gets even more boring...

Canberrans will no longer be able to enjoy fireworks over the Queen's Birthday long weekend. Industrial Relations Minister John Hargreaves today announced the permanent ban on the importation, sale and use of fireworks in the ACT.
We got two evenings, from 5-9pm over one long weekend, in the middle of Canberra's soul-sucking winter, to buy and use fireworks. It was something actually cool about Canberra, because fireworks are illegal everywhere else in Oz. Now I'll have to wait for my next trip to Japan to play with fireworks. :(
"The Government understands that many Canberrans will still have fireworks that were bought legally on previous Queen's Birthday long weekend. We will be encouraging people to do the right thing and hand in any stored fireworks for safe disposal without any questions asked."
Yeah. That's going to happen.

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Tuesday, August 25, 2009

blonde jokes are usually kinda silly

But this one made me laugh. :)

THE BLONDE WHO MARRIED A CATHOLIC

On their honeymoon, the blonde bride slipped into a sexy nightie and, with great anticipation, crawled into bed, only to find her new Catholic husband had settled down on the couch.

When she asked him why he was apparently not going to make love to her, he replied, 'It's Lent'.

In tears, she sobbed, 'That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! Who did you lend it to, and for how long?'

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Saturday, August 08, 2009

ink notes #2: the tipping point


Here's my entry for ink notes #2.

This was the music prompt. Go here if you want all the info on how the challege works. If you like writing - poetry, short fiction, whatever - come on in, the water's fine. :) I'm actually a bit late with this one, so here's the link to the current challenge. My entry for that will be along shortly.



The Tipping Point

Gio crept into the house, cursing silently at the huge click as he shut the door. What was the opposite of ‘ninja’? This was the craziest damn plan now that he was putting it into action, but when she had given him that soft, hopeful look in the car it had felt like the only possible course. Just thinking about her now he could feel his heartbeat slowing. She calmed him, that sweet brown-haired girl.

He moved easily down the empty, carpeted hallway. No toys left out from play, no small, haphazard shoes sprawled across Janine’s perfect space. She had no tolerance for such things. God she could be cold. It firmed his resolve, pushed him past her sleeping form in their bed and on to the waiting chest of drawers.

It didn’t take him long to fill the overnight bag. He couldn’t tell in the dark what matched and didn’t, but Bron didn’t care what he wore anyway. He risked another minute of potential discovery sneaking into the en suite for a few toiletries; even managed one of the pillows from his side of the bed. Janine muttered a little in her sleep, but didn’t wake. He left as stealthily as he’d come, but the air tasted like freedom when the door clicked again with him outside and walking away.

Thirty minutes later they were on the Kings Highway heading East with a full tank and way too many snacks. They’d gotten Bron’s gear earlier before the stealth mission to his place. She was singing along with the radio, mostly getting the words wrong but her voice was pretty. Goofy girl. She’d changed everything – everything – and she didn’t even know it. He could see her eyes were heavy with not enough sleep and he reached into the back seat for the pillow.

‘Tuck it between you and the window. I know it’s awkward with your seatbelt on, but if you put the seat back a little you might get comfy enough to sleep.’

As she shifted around, still singing softly, he tried to focus on the road. In the back of his mind the realisation of what had really just happened was building with each extra kilometre he put between himself and Janine. By the time he hit Braidwood he knew for sure that the next time he went back to the house it would be to collect the rest of his things. He’d left his wife tonight. He couldn’t quite take it in, but looking over at his daughter sleeping in the seat next to him, he couldn’t regret it either.

When Bronwyn’s mother had found him, let him know that he had a six year old, Janine had accepted it…but not gracefully. She didn’t want her in their house. He could be a father if he wanted to, as long as it didn’t impact on her orderly life.

Bron stirred, stared out into the darkness still half asleep. ‘Daddy, are there really going to be kangaroos right on the beach?’

He grinned. This was the tale of wonder that had them both begging her mother to let them take off on this crazy midnight run to the coast; the roos that came in droves down to Pebbly Beach in the early morning.

‘There really are. I called ahead and they’re all quite eager to meet you.’

She giggled sleepily. ‘Kangaroos don’t have phones.’

No, he thought, but I have you. The fallout I’ll deal with later.

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